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How to Write a Screenplay
Do you watch movies? Sure, we all do, and I’m here to teach you a career that practically anyone can do. Screenwriting! Take it from me: screenwriting is easy; mostly all you have to do is come up with...
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Celebrities to Create Yet Another Masturbatory Exercise in Self-Congratulation
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Proving once again how highly they think of themselves, the crew of Ocean’s Eleven is planning to pump out yet another needless sequel to an already needless remake about a group of...
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New Movie to Humorously Reference Popular Culture
HOLLYWOOD, CA – For perhaps the first time in the history of cinema, a new movie is going to reference popular culture in humorous ways. The film, currently being produced by New Line Cinema, will be...
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I Cannot Wait for The Road
Of all the movies slated for release this year, the only one I am truly and completely looking forward to is The Road, an adaptation of Cormac McCarthy’s stunning, Pulitzer Prize winning novel of the...
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Mutant Movie Sequels
In the movie industry the big summer popcorn flicks, photo-realistic animated features, and prestige art films get all the attention, while the seedy underbelly of the industry manages to avoid the...
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Oscar Best Picture Marathon 2009: Preview
It’s that time of year again. The Oscar nominees have been announced, and that means that the Oscar Best Picture Marathon will be coming to a theater near me in about a month. Until then, I shall be...
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Oscar Best Picture Marathon 2009
This past Saturday the Oscar Best Picture Marathon rode into town. Like a kid on Christmas I was amped with anticipation. I was also up before the sun at the hour of 5 AM. Nothing, not hell nor high...
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I’m Ready…
Remember that part at the beginning of Titanic when Bill Paxton asked that old broad if she’s ready to go back, back to Titanic? Well I’m ready to go back, only not to Titanic, because that movie...
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Going to the Movies Alone: A Practical Guide
I’m going to come right out and say it, I go to the movies by myself. To many, this may seem like a pathetic practice. Going to the movies is a social activity, something you do with friends or a date....
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“Special Features”
The advent of DVDs was a huge boon for the movie nerds of the world, and not just because of the increased sound and picture fidelity or the ability to effortlessly skip around to the good bits. For...
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